I wrote the entry below almost two years ago. And I think, I'm in this stage again now. It's funny how so much in me has changed, and yet, so much of what I felt before I'm feeling again now. Melancholy does have its way of seeping in in our lives. And at times, in the most inopportune moments, we break. And we grasp at straws for any sense of explanation to keep us afloat.
These are the moments I hope would
never
come back.
---
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Because I missed partying tonight due to some circumstances beyond my control, melancholy kicked in--or more precisely, the feeling of longing for someone to hold and be with re-surfaced. While surfing the net and hanging out in my usual sites, I remembered the feeling of having someone to converse with during these lonely times. I remembered the feeling of sharing one's life with someone else, and then growing in the process.
More than anything else, it's that connection to someone that keeps me looking back.
I've been single for a few months now. Eight months to be exact. The longest time that I have been single since I was 20. Six years do pass by swiftly, and sometimes, when one gets used to routines all those years, it's hard not to miss it. The comfortable feeling almost always has its way of creeping back to your consciousness.
No matter how much you tell yourself you already changed.
You realize, some things just keep on coming back.
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