jeez. im so not freakin cut out for this. this freakin new world i've been trying to get into (not the legal profession, mind you, hehe) is so much more than i can handle. one moment, it feels like heaven; the next feels like shit. jealousy rules the world, and non-commitment permeates the players. argh. what have i ever done to deserve this? from one failed attempt to the next, i feel like i'm losing sanity and stability. i wonder what will happen if i quit altogether. i wonder what will become of me if i revert to my old life. will it be simpler and happier? or is staying and pushing forward the only way to go? hay. life. its complexity is infinitely more than i can even try to understand. i just hope i survive. i just hope i see the light soon. i just hope.
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