Outrage

i saw a live video clip of edsa shrine just now. and the freakin police barricaded it? what? seriously? on the day of the celebration of EDSA I's anniversary, the shrine has been cut off from the people that made it historical? something is wrong in this country. something is definitely wrong.

and we only have to look at the leadership to know what.

Garapalan

she said she came to know about it only the night before she left for china and for the sake of diplomatic relations, she signed it anyway. oh come on. Who buys this crap? Doesn't she mean she knew about it because of her unconscionable kickbacks and that she cancelled it because she was caught red handed with her hands in the cookie jar? get real, man.

now, it's her armed minions' turn to close the lid through a press con. as if anything they say is credible.

good thing it's the oscars today, at least there's something worthwhile to watch.

Now

since im not doing anything yet, and since im half bored to death, i figured, why not just watch dirty sexy money? so i did.

i mean, i still am. now. hehehe.. ;p

Tonight

some of my old college blockmates and i are meeting up for dinner tonight. and even if we're dining out in a place i can barely afford (titit!!! grrr...), i still am actually excited to be there. it's been ages since we all sat down, enjoyed food, and talked our hearts away. i just hope this night will be as enjoyable as i think it'll be. see you later guys! ;p

Days

How long has it been since I first visited Makati as a law student? That time when I looked at this city with a sense of awe, like a mountain whose grandeur I am challenged to conquer. How long ago has it been since I was being constantly lost in the labyrinthine design of Glorietta? That time when, eating for the first time at TGI Fridays with my brother, I didn’t even know how to appreciate food the way all of us should.

Everything then was just part of a large whirling world where particulars dissolved into the bigger haze of the wider picture.

But not anymore.

Many things have already changed. Many events have already taken place. Major experiences have shaped the person I am now. Minor ones have defined who I have always been. Indeed, this is a time when, looking back at my lost youth, I appreciate the beauty before me, keeping in mind the wonder I have always had the first time I beheld them. Yes, I have matured. But I have never forgotten.

Not yet, at least.

More and more each day, as that clock ticks my life away, as I ask the questions of how long it has been, I am moving into the realm of adulthood where slowly, subtly, I leave that era of my life where everything is as carefree as birds in the wild. This time, that adorable innocence is being replaced by the fierce convalescence of a long dormant falcon in me. As I get ready to soar in this world, I leave behind the nest that was home for many of my childhood memories, that nest that will inevitably succumb to the powers of the wind, and then will eventually disappear. And be gone. Forever.

I am afraid of that day. I am scared of losing ground in this groundless world. I am frightened of that time when I will no longer ask, for I can no longer remember to ask, how long it has been since I first visited Makati, since I first experienced the wonders of a new city, the grandeur of an unknown mountain, and the innocence of a long forgotten youth.

I am afraid of that day…

…a day that will surely come.

that feeling

it's here again, that feeling that crushes my heart in every way possible, that excruciating heaviness of the body, that feeling that i wish would never last. i'm hurting again, i feel betrayed again, insulted even. it's that familiar feeling i feel when persons i'm in relationship with experience jealousy in the presence of exes. it's that sad feeling of not being trusted. and it crushes my heart, more so now than before. im surprised it gets me this easily this fast. i suppose it's because my birthday's just passed. i suppose it's because of my disposition upon knowing it. i dont know for sure. at least not as sure as the fact that i'm sad. really sad. and betrayed. and insulted. and i'm being threatened to give up. and move on. sad.