Stuck

If you want to get unstuck, give yourself a kick in the butt. 

Someone said that in Facebook today. And it hit me. Made me think of myself and my current situation. Am I stuck? Am I in that phase in my life when everything holds still for that one moment that will eventually give me the most needed push? Or alternatively, am I where I needed to be, and me choosing to be in this place is not being stuck; rather, it's me moving in exactly the right direction? 

It's not often when it happens that I get confused (not in my life situation at least). Often, friends would tell me I'm the most logical person they know. Well, the most emotional logical person, that is. But whatever, I often get a certain sense, an outline if you must, of how my life should proceed; of how, when and where I should go. 

But this time, that one line, that one small thought, unnerved me and made me ask. Where then should I go, if at all? Or should what I am now stay so I'd know where to go? Am I blinded by my emotions that it kept me stuck in the same place, or is that same emotion the only driving force keeping me afloat these days? 

There are so many questions that need even more answers, and I am grasping at straws on how to reach them. I think I am happy. But should I really be? I want this to last, but will what I receive last?

I don't know. I'm taking it one step at a time. Stuck or being  unstuck, whatever. I'll enjoy what I have now; and like always, I'll do it by not doing, for this, too, I know, shall come to pass.

One week

It's been one long week. I wonder if you'd ever find your way back. Or if we should continually get lost moving on. Walls are starting to rise, distance is starting to divide. Now is the time to act. Or it is gonna be too late. Sigh.

To be in and out of love...

Excerpts from…

WHEN YOU FALL IN LOVE

(Debunking The Myths That Are Driving You Crazy)

By Bo Sanchez

You start blaming your partner for the loss of love. This is nutty. But many people do it: when we don't feel in love, we think it's the fault of the other person. And so we fight him. Again, we fall out of love because we're human beings. It's nobody's fault. The moment you fall out of love, the real work begins . Let me explain. This is the most important point I'm going to make. (I got this from Scott Peck in his bestseller book, The Road Less Traveled).

Falling in love isn't love. Here's why. When you fall in love…

No decision is required. Falling in love just happens.

No effort is required. Falling in love is like…. well, falling.

No hard work is required. Falling in love is being bitten by the love bug.

On the other hand, true love requires all three : Decision, effort and lots of hard work. In the Bible, love is a command. You make it happen. Sure true love can only happen after you've fallen out of love. When you begin choosing to love, even if you don't feel like doing it — that's true love. And that's the foundation of a lasting marriage.

---

College, when I first learned to love, seems like a long long time ago. Now, years later, I still believe in the same thing. I love. And I hope it would never change.

A lifetime

Yesterday, I felt your love again. And it made me whole. Your soft kisses and the endearing touch of your presence were enough to remind me, that was why I loved you in the first place. Now, what I have is our last memory together as a happy couple, and that sweetest memory will already last me a lifetime.

Thank you, M.

Crossroads

After everything, I now know that I am at a crossroad. The paths have now been cleared, the carpet laid. I have but to choose. 

On the one hand, I could stay, but only if I get unconditional love. I cannot, and will not, settle for less. Not anymore. On the other, I'd turn around and completely erase you out of my life, to begin anew. 

None of these will be easy. Both will require work. But for what it's worth, whatever I choose, I will have move on. To a stronger love regarding the first, and hopefully to a happier future in relation to the next. Yes, either way, I will have move on.

And I can't wait. This drama has already taken its toll. It needs to stop.

And that begins now.

Ikaw pa rin

Until now, there's only one name I hope to see when I go online. It's yours. I hope you know that.

Your Eyes

YOUR EYES

RENT

Your Eyes 

As We Said Our Goodbyes 

Can't Get Them Out Of My Mind 

And I Find I Can't Hide (From) 

Your Eyes 

The Ones That Took Me By Surprise 

The Night You Came Into My Life 

Where There's Moonlight 

I See Your Eyes 

How'd I Let You Slip Away 

When I'm Longing So To Hold You 

Now I'd Die For One More Day 

'Cause There's Something I Should 

Have Told You 

Yes There's Something I Should Have 

Told You 

When I Looked Into Your Eyes 

Why Does Distance Make Us Wise? 

You Were The Song All Along 

And Before The Song Dies 

I Should Tell You I Should Tell You 

I Have Always Loved You 

You Can See It In My Eyes

Mimi